What happens and how can I RE-direct my attention, for example with meditation?
Repetitions of unpleasant conversations (private as well as professional), missed opportunities (what if ...) and embarrassing regrets distract us during the day, reduce our focus at work or keep us awake at night. How many times have you tormented yourself over a stupid thing you said. Or rehearsing a conversation that has not yet taken place. Our brain often wanders off into senseless fantasies and psychological self-flagellation. According to Dr. Fred Luskin of Standford University, we have up to 60,000 thoughts a day and we usually worry about our past or future instead of focusing on the here and now. This is a lot of the time we get angry about things we can't control and not pay attention to what is actually going on in our lives. The first step in stopping obsessive thoughts is realizing that you have them, which is harder than it sounds. The reason we can get lost in thoughts so easily is because we are not aware that we are lost in thought. Think about how you can "drift away" during a phone call and suddenly find that you have missed a solid five minutes on what the person on the other end said. Thinking is a powerful thing and it doesn't need your help or permission to take over your brain.
One can break the cycle of brooding by consiously noting one's thoughts and instead re-directing one's attention to something tangible or physical.
A few years ago I came across an interesting online article in which Lynne Goldberg (meditation coach) presented her method of how to do exactly this in just 2 minutes. Admittedly, it does take a little practice and, above all, the critical ones among you will first have to get involved before it actually works. Just give it a try. It helped me.
The following is the Goldberg method in a nutshell (www.lynnegoldbergmeditation.com):
First, look around and see where you are.
Then close your eyes and hear the sounds around you, be it the barking of a dog, the honking of a car or the hum of the building elevator. "Allow yourself to be there with the sounds," says Goldberg.
Take a deep breath to calm yourself down, then, as soon as the air touches your nostrils as you inhale, feel it fill your chest and abdomen, and then as it leaves your body as you exhale, and notice whether the air feels warmer or colder.
Repeat for five deep breaths.
I hope I was able to expand your existing repertoire of exercises and maybe help one or the other of you or give them food for thought ?!
If you would like to tell me about your experiences with the method or your methods for coping with circling thoughts, then comment on it - I look forward to reading from you ...